"MLFM(which stands for MyLoveForMusic) episode #019 - Just For Me{Side A}" shows the low-point with me in regards to how I was feeling about myself, with work, with school, with my podcasts. I did not like my former job, it made me a cynical when it came to people in the world. It made me realize that for some we as humans can be a "whiny/pathetic/self-absorb" species and little did I know it, I was becoming that way. I began to feel that the job I had was my career and not just a job. I became lazy, didn't want to go outside, go out and meet people. I watched television most of the time, neglected my school work and almost failed and in the end I could blame no one but myself. I became a person that was a person that tried and mask it all. Telling people, "Everything is going great!" but was living a terrible lie. Wasn't into God's word the way that I should, griping about the economy, the politicians, celebrities and how good they have and "why not me?", I felt my podcast was not going any where in regards to listeners. We went on a cruise for our 10th wedding anniversary, which was a blast, went to Branson, Missouri, another great short weekend trip and then the bottom fell out and toward the end of 2010 I was like, "What am I doing wrong?"
exit: stage left...part II
The second podcast, "Side B" reflect a turn of events. First, although I'm only working temp jobs I'm work. Second, I began working at places where I could begin some serious reflection on what I need to do in regards to my life. Third, I was able to finally purchase my first DSL camera and began learning photography again, and last, I finally took the plunge and switched from BlackBerry to Android (I love my Samsung Mesmerize...no I don't work for them but so dig this phone). This may not seem like a big thing to you but for me it meant a dramatic change for me because for once in my life I began to challenge myself.
When I took my Fall 2 class I made up in my mind that I would study...I mean really study. First I had a wonderful instructor, Peggy Dersch, I can't send enough "Thank Yous" her way. She made me realize how funny school can be again and if I don't come across another instructor that was a dedicated, intriguing I will think of her for inspiration. I study and in the process of the work I put into it my result was a "B" for my grade. I realized that television is cool but when it comes to achieving what God has put into me I have step away from TV, the Internet and get to work. Then I began to not only listen to positive messages but began "applying" them in my life. I have to admit from time to time it's a challenge because your mind and body wants to go back to familiar territory but you have to push on and I will. I've read many reviews on the book, "Who Moved My Cheese?" as dumb, stupid, a "rip off". But what I've come to realize is that what may be unimportant to some means the world to another person. I have the audio book and I have listened to that book at least once a week and each time I come away with a new outlook on what I need to do.
Another turn of events was a message I truly needed called, "Putting off Procrastination" by Dr. Charles Stanley. I listen to that message was a day because it keeps me focus and makes me realize I only get out of life what I put into it. Fear of failure has always been a factor for me. I have allowed fear of failure to keep me from so many things and in a way that is why I also like "Who Moved My Cheese?" because it addresses that issue as well.
Then while listening to podcasts from Fresh Air with Terry Gross, her year end, "Best of" was right on time for me. Hearing the interviews she had with Keith Richard, Brian May, Jay-Z, John Steward, Aziz Ansari, Sarah Silverman, Joan Rivers got me back in the game in regards to seeing what abilities I have been blessed with in regards to ideas that has always been inside me. What really pushed me over the edge in regards to positive flow was the interview that Frederick van Johnson had with gifted photographer Rebekka Guðleifsdóttir. Her insight on photogrpahy and how to approach "your own way" was so insightful and refreshing. Which brings me back to my podcast...
sitting at the computer I discovered a cool site called, lounge-radio.com and there was a "re-birth" for me in regards to music. I found wonderful downtempo, lounge music and also I was looking at a way to mesh this genre with classic 80s and 90s tunes. My heart will always be a love for Jazz, New Age, and Ambient but I felt it was time to take my podcast in another direction and when I heard this music plus some favorite videos from YouTube plus the wonderful soundtrack from the movie Sherlock Holmes by Hans Zimmer, "MyLoveForMusic" was reborn to me and you tell how "Side B" took a turn toward the "glass half full" outlook on how I feel about music in my opinion.
The Bonus podcast is the playlist of gentlemen I know via Twitter, Fave(Trel Robinson, Todd Kelley "The BigLa" and Doug Fresh)and blogging site Vox(gone but not forgotten), a great tune from the 80s, "Don't Disturb This Groove" by The System and other artists I have followed over the decades wrapped up this 3-part series very nicely. It shows that yes, MyLoveForMusic will continue on and I will look for more was to enhance this site by bridging different genres of music together. What this has done for me also is to make me embark for my passion and hobby for photography, blogging more, learning about how to become a better writer. And in essence it now makes me go and work out to become healthy because believe it or not when you take on photography, going to different sights to photograph you have to be in some type of shape believe you/me. This new love for music has made me realize to be myself and branch out more in other ways.
I've always known that music can tell a story about a person but I didn't know how it would be my story.
0 comments:
Post a Comment